Mastering a Virtue You’re Already Good At
The virtue my wife and I are focusing on this week is peacefulness.
Most anyone who knows us would say that Dawn and I have carved out a very peaceful and tranquil life for ourselves. In fact, we recently renamed our home “Tranquility Base”. Quiet, peaceful, calm, and serene are all accurate descriptions of our lives.
So why pick peacefulness as our virtue focus if we’re already doing quite well in that department? Well, many people try to improve upon things they’re not so good at, and that’s probably not the best use of their time, effort, and energy.
Working on getting better at things we’re already good at usually has a much better ROI (Return on Investment).
Besides, who doesn’t want a more peaceful existence? The biggest room in the world is the room for improvement.
For each virtue, I take a page or two in my journal and do a rough mind map (nothing too organized) and jot down ideas about how to create more of what we want. In this case, peace and tranquility.
I started with listing what detracts from our peace: things like noise, ringing telephones, cable news, fears, too much scheduled, worry, incompletions, taking things too seriously, attachments to outcomes, and more.
I also write down beliefs that I have about the week’s virtue. Are they helpful or do they work against my peace and solitude? What do I think is true about the virtue and also about its opposite? In this case: conflict, consternation, and anxiety.
What are the access points to this week’s virtue? How can I master this virtue? For peacefulness, I’ve noted: forgiveness, gratitude, breathing, acceptance, good health, and smiling.
I also like to look for pithy quotes about the subject. Here’s three I found:
“There is no way to peace, peace is the way.” —A. J. Muste
“Peace is not something you wish for. It is something you make, something you are, something you do, and something you give away.” ―Robert Fulghum
“The way of peace is the way of truth.” —Mahatma Gandhi
Another thing I do is write and review affirmations about my current virtue. Three examples:
“I am 100% responsible for my peace and tranquility. Peacefulness begins and ends with me.”
“I trust the dance. No doubt the Universe is unfolding as it should.”
“Every day in every way, I embrace and enhance my peace.”
By immersing myself in my chosen virtue a few minutes a day, I come to know, understand, and embody the virtue better.
So far (it’s only Monday as I write this) the best strategy for peacefulness I’ve found is from the Stoics: “Change what you can, cope with what you can’t.”
We find what we seek. Rarely all at once and not often quickly, but always progress.
Living your best life requires focus. And this simple method of focusing on one virtue each week has proven to be quite effective for me—and fun. Even more so, since my wife and I started doing it together. I invite you to give it a try.
For access to the article about focusing on weekly virtues, and a long list of virtues to choose from, go to https://successnet.org/virtues/
Make it a great day! A peaceful great day.
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