When I was a boy, my parents often told me not to get my hopes up when I wanted something. They didn’t want me to be disappointed. I’m sure many other well-intended parents have done the same thing.
But I don’t think it was all that helpful. The ideal is to have very clear intentions with high expectations AND, at the same time, have no ATTACHMENT to the outcome or the manner in which the intention is achieved.
I know that may sound paradoxical, but it works.
It’s not that you shouldn’t CARE about the outcome. You should. I’m simply advocating that you be UNINVESTED in the intention—especially the way you think it should happen.
It’s my belief that our job is to decide what we want—clearly, specifically and with great expectation.
But I also think it’s important to get clear on what you REALLY want—not what you THINK you want.
Bear with me here. Let’s say you think you want a red sports car. You may even know what make and model you want. But is it really the red sports car you desire or is it the feelings and experiences you think those four wheels will bring you? There may be other ways to achieve that without buying that particular car.
It’s fine to be clear on your desires, but it’s critical that we understand WHY we want something. By staying open to the REAL objective, we allow much more abundance in our lives.
A friend of mine has been looking to buy a house and found the one he and his wife want. But the negotiations have been complicated with lots of delays, disappointments and difficulties.
He was becoming anxious about it and afraid they might miss out on the deal. And of course, as someone becomes anxious and worrisome, they tend to attract what they don’t want—kind of like a prayer in reverse.
So I wrote and shared the following affirmation with him so he could reconnect with his otherwise positive nature.
“We now accept, expect and appreciate that this house—or an even better one—is now ours. The ways, means, negotiations—in fact, all the details—are being worked out with perfect timing, harmony and ease. All parties win. It is complete.”
It’s good to put in something like, “This or something better” in an affirmation because we want to be careful we don’t limit the good that can come our way.
With an attitude and a practice of “Clear Intention Without Attachment”, there’s no question in my mind they will find their right and perfect house.
Is this approach easy to implement? Not always. It takes some practice. But with that practice, it gets easier.
And it certainly results in more calm, peace, confidence and success.
Recommended Reading
How to Create a Vital Vision for Your Life
Live Your Life by Design Instead of by Default
No thinking person would ever start to build a house from just a rough sketch or a vague idea. And yet, hardly anyone has specific plans for how they want their life to be. Our lives are certainly more important than a house. This book gives you the impetus, the tools and the guidelines to create a meaningful, inspiring and detailed vision for your best life.
